Who Needs That Many Fireworks Anyway?

Do you ever feel like there's so many things to do, so many things you want to experience, that your mind actually tells you it's impossible to achieve them all? I do that a lot... I can focus on the present for a certain amount of time, then my brain decides it wants to think about things that would be fun to do... Only this time it was different.

I started thinking about all the things I'd been wanting to do, achieve, accomplish... Whatever you'd like to call it. There's a million thoughts buzzing through my head, crashing and bursting... I guess you could say like fireworks on a perfectly clear night... You know the stars that stay constant and shine in the distance, but the fireworks are so loud and bright that they distract you from the things that stay constantly beautiful... Even if they're light years away. I would say that all the fireworks are thoughts about today, tomorrow, next week even. My mind is so drawn to those that I've forgotten the stars in my mind, visible only on a clear night, the thoughts that are about things relatively far away.

The all knowing They say that right at this moment, time is a gift, and that's why it's called The Present... But the little clause they tend to leave out is that the present only means something when there's a future ahead... A goal you could say. I think I've been good with the present, but all those fireworks have made me forget that the present is always leading to the future. Once the bright colours and noises have faded away, the stars are what remain there no matter what.

Mental stars are different for everyone, some people focus on one constellation, others a single star... Some chase after a shooting star (only to figure out it was a plane). Some spend their whole lives searching for the star no one else has found. For me, I can say I've focused on one constellation my whole life... the one that kind of looks like an artist. But I had a moment of clarity... and there's a sky full of other stars out there... Ones that make you realise there is so much more to life than a single constellation. I guess you can say that from now on, there will always be a set of stars that shine brighter for me than all the others, the ones that will shine clearer even through the fireworks on a mental New Year's Eve.

Oh and dear readers, I know I talk about the sky a lot. It helps to think about the universe out there, that there is so much more to life than the little things that bug us every day. The one thing I love about load shedding (scheduled power outages due to strain on the grid, for those overseas), is that when the lights go out, if you stand outside, you can see the stars clearer than on any night in Johannesburg. I guess now I don't need the lights to go out or even for it to be night time to see my own stars.

When in doubt, find your own stars dear readers.

Until we meet again

Talia