Motivating the World, One Person at a Time

Well...

It certainly has been long enough hasn't it dear readers?

Well, shall we say that some turbulence in my life and general busyness and such has kept me away for far too long. But all is not lost, I have made some art in my time away and had a good reassessment of my life. The sun is still shining. The birds are still singing. And there is still plenty of art to be made! So here I am, with my first blog post since September.

So as cheesy and corny as it sounds to mention it, I turned 20 on Wednesday. No longer the teenager of the nineties but now a young adult. And since I have started working at my Christmas job, I realised something quite powerful.

Do you ever feel defeated by the world? By the people that are supposed to care about you? Have you ever wondered what you're doing with your life at the moment? Well, maybe if we all just started believing in one another's dreams a bit more, maybe the world would be a better place. On my birthday, I bumped into one of my old friends from High school. She didn't know it was my birthday but was an avid follower of the artwork I posted on Instagram. She told me that she thought I was really making something of my life and that I need to post so much more often. When I started my training for my new job, I had to do a quick sketch for a teamwork activity. My teammates and other trainees were so impressed that they started interrogating me as to why I don't draw more.

Why have I not been drawing more?

I stopped believing in my ability to create my own success.

But.

When people tell you out of the goodness of their hearts, that they think you are special, that you have something unique to bring to the world, it is probably one of the most inspiring forms of motivation I have yet to witness. Total strangers telling me they think I could change the world with my art, if that isn't good enough motivation, I don't know what is.

So dear readers, tell someone today, a stranger, a friend, your partner, tell them you believe in their dreams and their goals and watch the transformation.

Until we meet again
Talia

Fight Not Flight

FEAR. The stomach-sinking, heart-pounding, hand-shaking feeling that strikes everyone at least once in their lifetime. Fear doesn't necessarily have to be a phobia, and it doesn't always have to be something you can predict in advance. Sometimes fear strikes you on the spot in the heat of the moment.

Other than phobias and common little fears that most people experience every now and again. Today was the first time I had experienced the real fear of losing someone incredibly close to me. I've never experienced emotions like what I've experienced today. If you've watched Inside Out, you would know that the personified emotions of fear and sadness were separated. Today I felt like I had an insane mixture of the two that happened to be on some crazy steroids.

I won't share the whole story of how these emotions came about. But when I thought that I had lost that person forever, and not even by my own choice, I panicked. I had never felt emotions like this before, I had no idea how to react or how to get myself back together. I felt like a massive explosion of bottled up emotions had imploded through my veins. I felt like my blood had actually run cold, somehow icily still pumping through my heart into the rest of my body. I was defeated. More defeated than I can ever remember before. I pray that none of you have to go through that feeling, because it truly is a wretched experience to endure.

But.

All was not lost.

In some far corner of my petrified heart, a spark of adrenaline made my brain override the emotions and fight. If you've ever met me, you would know that I'm not a fighter. But dammit I fought today. I was not enduring this pain that was inflicted upon me. I fought and choked back those stifling tears. And I didn't become a victim of the battle. By some miracle I got the person I care about so dearly back. I don't know how this day turned around like it did. I still feel like I was in the battle of the century. But I survived. And more importantly than surviving, I managed to get my incredibly special person back.

I'll be damned if I get that close to losing you again.

Dear readers, don't EVER let it get this close. Don't neglect someone to the point that you can't get them back. Never take the people around you for granted, because I promise you you don't want to know what the world would be like without them. Love them like both of you could be gone tomorrow and there's no chance to show them you love them again.

Until we meet again
Talia  

That Confusing Question

"Is being consistently inconsistent the same as being inconsistently consistent?" Chances are your brain just froze a little bit trying to decipher that question. Mine does the same thing even though I've thought about this question more than once. Whilst you're probably picking your brain trying to figure it out... I thought I'd pick my brain a bit on consistency and persistence.

Throughout my life, the one thing I've always been consistently good at is throwing myself into my art and putting in so much effort that what was required. I was so consistent at it that I made it a habit for myself. And last year when I was going through an especially rough phase in my life, my work and my art became my reason for existence for several months. Metaphorically my art became my significant other.

This is a good strategy when you're going through a rough time and feeling quite alone in the world. But for me, I suffered for a while and then the suffering stopped. I picked myself up and started living life again. I found someone I could actually talk to and touch and be held when I was feeling upset. Someone who makes me feel special, and someone who I can care about. I remember for a while when I was single I would actually miss caring for someone, but then I would distract myself by drawing and painting.

Now I have realised a flaw in my past strategy for beating loneliness through art. When you apply consistency to only one area of your life, and you apply a lot of it, chances are the consistency everywhere else in your life diminishes. There's the flaw you don't really see until other people point it out to you, and I realise that I have been a guilty party for quite a while. I guess you could say I'm both consistently inconsistent and inconsistently consistent in many other aspects of my life.

As various self-help books will probably tell you, admitting you have a problem is the first step to fixing it. Now my goal is to be consistently consistent in every other area of my life. I think posting once a week every week on this blog is a good motivation to be consistent.

Until we meet again dear readers
Talia
P.S. Being consistently inconsistent isn't the same as inconstantly consistent, just in case you were wondering. It took me an hour to figure it out, but I have an answer now at least!

Wanted

Is it a crime to want more than you already have? Is it wrong to want more, constantly?

The truth is, dear readers, I have no idea what the correct answer to that is... but I think that if your heart is in the right place, and maybe your mind too, wanting more can't be such a bad thing. I'm one of those people that has learnt to accept what is given, more by habit than by any particular rule or bad experience. I guess it's just something that has become a part of me over time. And I haven't really questioned that aspect of myself... until recently.

I've realised over the last few weeks that wanting more isn't a bad thing at all... It all depends on what that "more" means. If you're a billionaire and you want even more money, that's probably a bad thing. If you hypothetically control the entire world and then you want to control the Martians (if they exist)... then might be a problem.

But what if your heart wants more? There is already enough hatred in this cruel world of ours, so much pain and suffering that we've actually become numb to because we've learnt to not see it. I can't believe that there was ever a doubt in my mind that wanting care and love someone more could ever be a bad thing... I guess I just needed a hypothetical slap in the face to be reminded that caring more could never be a bad thing... Even if everyone is not that appreciative or reciprocating.

Just this little (or not so little) change in perspective has kinda changed my way of seeing the world... which admittedly hasn't been that great recently. But that's okay, sometimes you need a lot of rain to appreciate the sunshine again (or vice-versa for all you pluviophiles). I can actually feel my heart getting bigger and more loving everyday, now this introvert just has to work on showing it to the people that matter.

Keep those hearts going for the people you care about dear readers.

Until we meet again
Talia

P.S. If anyone happens to be a charitable billionaire this art student is always happy to get more art supplies too!